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[toxic_garden]

ich fands toll. :mrgreen:


TOP TEN REASONS FOR BEING AMERICAN (USA)



1 Big, bad, and don't care who doesn't like us

2 Every state is like another country.

3 Everything is available 24-7 365, to everyone.

4 Continental Europe could fit in Alaska.

5 We have a George W. as a president and haven't experienced a revolution because of it.

6 As much wide open space as Russia, but we have more money and Florida.

7 The beef.

8 Everyone knows who we are.

9 Jesse James is alive and well and builds motorcycles and hotrods.

10 You can own a pistol and carry it around hidden in your pants.



TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING DUTCH



1 You can get arrested for growing plants, but not for smoking them.

2 You can make jokes about the Belgians and still drink their beer.

3 a. You can legally kill yourself.

3 b. You can legally be killed.

4 You're exactly like the Germans, except that nobody hates you.

5 You think you are a world power, but everyone else thinks Copenhagen is your capital.....

6 You get to insult people and defend yourself by saying it's a national tradition.

7 You can put your finger in a dyke and it will save your country.

8 You live in the most densely populated country in Europe, and still you've never seen your neighbours.

9 If the economy is bad, blame the Germans. If a war is started, blame the Germans. If you lose your keys, blame the Germans.

10 Bikes are public property. Locks are a challenge.



TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING BELGIAN



1 You get to speak three languages, but none of them intelligibly.

2 If other countries want to fight a war, they will do it in your country.

3 You can brew drinks out of fruit, and still call it beer.

4 You are either:

a.like the Dutch, just less efficient

b.like the French, just less romantic

c.like the Germans

5 Decent fries. Real mayonnaise. Great chocolate. The best beer.

6 No one knows anything about you, except for the Dutch and French and they make fun of you.

7 More scandals in a week than any other country in a decade.

8 You can drive like a maniac on the road and nobody cares.

9 All your famous countrymen are either imaginary, or sex-offenders.

10 Face it. It's not really a country, is it?



TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING FRENCH:



1. When speaking fast you can make yourself sound gay.

2. Experience the joy of winning the World Cup for the first time.

3. You get to eat insect food like snails and frog's legs.

4. If there's a war you can surrender really early.

5. You don't have to read the subtitles on those late night films on Channel 4.

6. You can test your own nuclear weapons in other people's countries.

7. You can be ugly and still become a famous film star.

8. Allow Germans to march up and down your most famous street humiliating your sense of national pride.

9. You don't have to bother with toilets, just shit in the street.

10. People think you're a great lover even when you're not.





TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING NORWEGIAN:



1. You get to pay the highest taxes in the world.

2. You can kill baby seals and eat Rudolf the Reindeer.

3. You live in total freezing darkness half the year and get 24 hour ozone-hole radiation the other half.

4. You can get capital punishment for smoking dope.

5. You can go skiing in your knickers.

6. You get to hate the Swedes and beat the Brazilians in football.

7. You have to be a woman to get anywhere.

8. You don't need to worry about land prices rocketing - its fairly spacious.

9. When abroad you can impress people you meet with stories about killing polar bears and shagging penguins - and they believe you.

10. You can actually get bored with blondes.



TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ENGLISH :



1. Two World Wars and One World Cup.

2. Warm beer.

3. You get to confuse everyone with the rules of cricket.

4. You get to accept defeat graciously in major sporting events.

5. Union jack underpants.

6. Water shortages guaranteed every single summer.

7. You can live in the past and imagine you are still a world power.

8. Bathing once a week - whether you need to or not.

9. Ditto changing underwear.

10. Beats being Welsh.



TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING SCOTTISH :



1. You ain't English!

2. You ain't English!

3. You ain't English!

4. You ain't English!

5. You ain't English!

6. You ain't English!

7. You ain't English!

8. You ain't English!

9. You ain't English!

10. You ain't English!



TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING WELSH:



1. You've got to be having a laugh, haven't you?



TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING SPANISH :



1. Glorious history of killing South American tribes.

2. The rest of Europe thinks Africa begins at the Pyrenees.

3. You get your beaches invaded by Germans, Danes, Brits, etc.

4. The rest of your country is already invaded by Moroccans.

5. Everybody else makes crap paella and claims it's the real thing.

6. Honesty.

7. Only sure way of bedding a woman is to dress up in stupid, tight clothes and risk your life in front of bulls.

8. You get to eat bull's testicles.

9. Gibraltar.

10. Supported Argentina in Falklands War.



TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ITALIAN :



1. In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes.

2. Unembarrassed to wear fur.

3. No need to worry about tax returns.

4. Glorious military history prior to 400BC.

5. Can wear sunglasses indoors.

6. Political stability.

7. Flexible working hours.

8. Live near the Pope.

9. Can spend hours braiding girlfriend's armpit hair.

10. Country run by Sicilian murderers.





TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING GERMAN :



1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

Give them a second chance



1. Oktoberfest.

2. Oktoberfest-beer.

3. BMW.

4. VW.

5. Audi.

6. Mercedes.

7. On a highway you can travel at a speed that would bring you to jail in any other country.

8. You do not have to learn German as a foreign language.

9. You think Sauerkraut is delicious.

10. Contrary to common belief laughing is not forbidden by law (yet).

[Beatfinger]

Sehr geil Wir deutschen werrden gemobbt

[Sapor Vitae]

Hihi, grossartig.

10. Contrary to common belief laughing is not forbidden by law (yet).

Was jetzt, echt nicht?

[phaylon]

TOP TEN REASONS FOR BEING AUSTRIAN

1. Not on the list in the original posting.

;)

[Mietze]

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING DUTCH

4 You're exactly like the Germans, except that nobody hates you.

Mal abgesehen von den Deutschen vielleicht.

[Sapor Vitae]

Hm, vielleicht kann man das hier ja etwas ausweiten:

Was wären denn eure

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING GERMAN :

?

(bzw. bitte das entsprechende Land wählen )

[toxic_garden]

hmm....gute Frage. Ums mal authentisch zu halten, die Antworten in englisch. Allerdings fallen mir momentan grad mal sechs ein.... :?

1) most countries think you are big, blond and muscluar.
2) everyone loves your beer
3) you can complain about everything and nearly everyone will agree, no matter how bad it really is
4) you don´t get arrested for driving 220 km/h at the highways
5) you can do a fun with nearly all americans and act like you were from switzerland. No one will take notice of the difference.
6) everyone lets you think you are a big player in world politics. This is damn cute!

[Sapor Vitae]

10 reasons for being .. (no, not german )

1. best chocolate in the world
2. you can have bad humour without anyone noticing
3. everything is at hand
4. very good train-connections
5. the landscapes look nicer than on the postcards
6. Rivella
7. everybody in the world is laughing at you
8. a lot of people think you're Swedish
9. You talk in an other language than you read your journal
10. Beyond the borders of your country nobody understands you

(Sie sind gebeten, über meine Englishfehler hinwegzusehen.)

[phaylon]

7. Schnitzel.
6. Still not on the list in the first posting.
5. A government you don't have to care of, because they're all the same.
4. Actual Beer.
3. People don't rape the word "Cola" with a feminin article.
2. Meat not only in child portions.
1. People know how to use escalators.
0. Schnitzel.
00. Huge parts of the world believe Hitler was german and Beethoven austrian.
000. No Bavaria.

[toxic_garden]

000. No Bavaria.

ok, dagegen komm ich nicht an.

Aber das...

2. Meat not only in child portions.

kann ich so nicht stehen lassen. Immerhin sind die Schnitzelgrößen aus dem (übrigens in Hessen gelegenen...*g*) Restaurant Waldgeist weltberühmt. Auch für ihre Cholesterinwerte.

(http://test.irgends.de/benni/schnitzel.jpg)

[phaylon]

kann ich so nicht stehen lassen. Immerhin sind die Schnitzelgrößen aus dem (übrigens in Hessen gelegenen...*g*) Restaurant Waldgeist weltberühmt. Auch für ihre Cholesterinwerte. :)

Ausnahmen. ;) Ich meine, 8dag Packungen Aufschnitt?! Das pack ich in eine einzige Semmel.

[Jinx]

10 reasons for being .. (no, not german )

1. best chocolate in the world
2. you can have bad humour without anyone noticing
3. everything is at hand
4. very good train-connections
5. the landscapes look nicer than on the postcards
6. Rivella
7. everybody in the world is laughing at you
8. a lot of people think you're Swedish
9. You talk in an other language than you read your journal
10. Beyond the borders of your country nobody understands you

(Sie sind gebeten, über meine Englishfehler hinwegzusehen.)

swiss?

[Thomas]

Sehr geil  Wir deutschen werrden gemobbt

Quatsch.Die haben halt immer noch Angst vor uns  

[Sapor Vitae]

10 reasons for being .. (no, not german )

swiss?

Bravo! (http://www.my-smileys.de/smileys2/klatsch_2.gif)